Our love relationships can bring us some of our deepest experiences of joy, but when they are troubled they can bring us unimaginable heartache and pain. Some couples will seek help before they are close to a breaking point, but more often therapy is seen as a “last resort” before ending a relationship. Having been there myself, I know from personal experience just how difficult this can be. But there is hope.
Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but it need not lead to contempt and irreparable damage. Learning how to take each other’s perspective, actively listen, communicate effectively, cultivate respect, appreciation and affection- these are learnable skills for a couple seeking their way back to love. We all bring some “baggage” to our relationships, some pattern of relating based on earlier experiences, and it is also useful to be aware of our own and our partner’s baggage. As a couples therapist, I can help you with learning important skills as well as coming to understand one another better.
My Master’s degree program included the study of family systems, but my direct experience of working with couples and families came first during 5 years that I worked with an organization called Familystrength in New Hampshire, US. We worked with families that were court ordered for therapy due to parental abuse/neglect or juvenile delinquency. We were the last chance for keeping the family intact. So, the kinds of issues I worked with tended to be severe. Following my work with Familystrength I worked for 7 years with an organization called Windhorse, where there was also a strong family/couples component to the work. Both of these jobs provided excellent opportunities for me to work with couples and develop the skills for helping them overcome great challenges.
Following on from my experience with Familystrength and Windhorse, I have included couples therapy as part of my work since arriving and opening my private practice in London in 2008. If you are not ready to give up, yet don’t see a way forward, book an initial consultation with me and we can explore possibilities.
For psychotherapy to be effective it is important to maintain regular appointments. Initially this is weekly, but in time we might agree to meet fortnightly. I understand that sometimes there will be circumstance that can interrupt regular attendance. In this case, I require 48-hour notice or else the full fee for the missed session will be due. Sometimes a missed session can be rescheduled in the same week if I am available at an alternative time when you can come.